Copy of Residency 2 - "Big Ass Book"

Deborah Read Belguendouz Artist Statement Summer Residency 2019 “Often the hands will solve a mystery that the intellect has struggled with in vain.” (Carl Jung) The work if not for the viewer. Its for me It is my own process of working with my self. It’s an artifact from a struggle of internal psychological forces Look at the shadow Abuse, horror, molestation, Combined with my full physical body Embodied experience How do you work with forces that you can’t see? With the unnameable, unconscious parts of ourselves of Our society How do you work with the unknown? The piece displays my vulnerabilities. I am shy about the inside There is a lack of finesse, or precision It shows my body’s limitations and lack of certain skills. I allow the material to reveal itself I dialogue with the mater I fight with the matter But at the same time allow it to speak To reveal itself Assimilate itself But if there is something I really want Something I desire Then I do battle How to do it? I must be clever And strong. I don’t let the materials dictate the outcome Cut, bind, stab Use any means necessary Tame it Or establish harmony Equilibrium No ideas of purity Or transcendence Mundane materials, easily molested, vulnerable to my attacks, desires Love is the enemy of purity Reveal and look at all shadow Incompetence, embarrassing, failure, Fear, shame, shy See my touch, my hand The struggle Redemption through honesty Through touch Through body Through flaws Through humanness Through passion No fleeing the body and its feelings The art is not for people’s transcendence No moral edification It is merely an artifact left From the struggle Like the skin shed from a molting snake The snake goes out in the world to live, To be of benefit in the ecosystem.